I am reaching out to uncover folks thoughts, suggestions, & recommendations in regards to death rituals, cemetery blessings, & the stewardship of graves.
I work within an active cemetery with many thousands buried there.
My current practices are:
When digging or filling a grave, I have a small stone with me to be an object to direct to & hold grief and other energies that would otherwise attach themselves to me. Then bury the stone or reuse the stone.
Occasionally cleansing myself with the smoke of sage, sweetgrass, and/or juniper after work.
Thank you for your time, patience, and thoughtfulness here.
I love your stone ritual. It seems very respectful and a good way to focus and divert energy. If it were me, I would recommend additional purification with salt.
Salt is widely used in purification, blessings, and earth magic rituals. I might lay (or cast) a small amount of salt on each grave I dig along with a small blessing.
I would continue to bring a stone with me in the graveyard, and cleanse it daily with a small amount of salt water to keep it purified. This could be as simple as dripping a few drops of salt water on top of it when you get home.
I personally find that Shinto ritual practices are incredibly good when it comes to purification and respectful interaction with spirits. If you are interested, perhaps you can find some additional wisdom there.
I think yourâre doing well with your current practice, and admire the sincerity with which you are working to be respectful.
Salt is easy to come by and has been used for centuries as a Clarifier and Purifier. Itâs my default go-to when wanting to rid myself of âattachmentsâ gained through living - I rub it on my hands, face, or feet, or put some in the bath to disentangle from unwanted âentanglementsâ.
I wouldnât get too hung up on the type of incense you are using - generally itâs the intent thatâs important. However, if you find an incense particularly desirable then go with that. Always follow your intention and intuition in these matters.
If it were me, I might also like a little ritual/prayer when crossing the threshold out of the cemetery for the day; Something like âI leave behind all that which isnât mine to carry. May the spirits seeking it find rest and peace.â Or something like that, however suits you. Anything done while exiting the gate is the idea Iâm trying to express so that crossing the threshold is an conscious act of leaving any sticky spirits behind in their proper place and you returning to the day world of the living without any hangers on.
I like the salt because to me it feels like offers some protection as well as purification.
There is also your SoP of course which can help with all of this as well, but itâs not maybe so practical while at work, but it does offer purification and protection when used regularly.
What an important job you have. Thanks for doing that work. It is tending to the sacred, most definitely!
Cemeteries still bother me. I know some work with grave dirt in another practice, but i was never comfortable walking in older Cemeteries. I think if working with a non family member grave its at least good to research the grave and learn more about the forgotten parts. Spend time just paying respect and maybe a burnt offering similar to Asian cultures with inscence burning.